Monday, April 24, 2006

Are you Asian American?

In light of Al's recent blog entry, I've compiled a list of some typical characteristics of Asians, particularly those who live in America. This is actually partially based on a forward that went around many years ago. It was written from the perspective of the 1 to 1.5 generation. However, I deleted quite a few of the entries (especially those pertaining to unclean foods) and added my own. Can you tell which ones I wrote? (Clue: I wrote ten of them...)

50 Ways to Know if You Are Asian-American
  1. You were/are a good student with a very high GPA
  2. You majored in something practical like engineering, medicine, or business
  3. You have more than one college degree, especially more than one Masters
  4. If you play a musical instrument, it must be piano
  5. If you play a second musical instrument, it must be violin
  6. You have a vinyl tablecloth on your kitchen table
  7. Your stove is covered with aluminum foil
  8. Your kitchen has a sticky film of grease over it
  9. You beat eggs with chopsticks
  10. You always leave outdoor shoes at the door
  11. You have a large supply of plastic slippers at the front and back doors
  12. Your backyard is an orchard/garden consisting of one variety of each tree and various Asian herbs (also maybe a rooster).
  13. You use the dishwasher as a dish rack
  14. You hang-dry your clothes either on a wooden rack or a clothesline
  15. You keep a Thermos of hot water available at all times
  16. You boil your drinking water or have a special water filter attached to the faucet
  17. You eat all meals in the kitchen to keep your dining room clean
  18. You don't use measuring cups when preparing foods
  19. You save grocery bags and use them to hold garbage
  20. You have a rice cooker
  21. You're a wok user
  22. You wash rice 2-3 times before cooking it
  23. You make sounds when you have a bowl of soup
  24. You don't dry-clean clothes, even if they need to be dry-cleaned
  25. You iron your own shirts
  26. You always cook yourself, even if you hate it
  27. You use credit cards, and pay monthly bills in full
  28. You keep most of your money in a savings account
  29. You buy Christmas cards after Christmas, when they are 50% off
  30. When you handwash dishes, you only use cold water
  31. You hate to waste food
    a) Even if you're totally full, if someone says they're going to throw away the leftovers on the table, you'll finish them
    b) You have Tupperware in your fridge with three bites of rice or one leftover chicken wing
  32. You don't own any real Tupperware--only a cupboard full of used but carefully rinsed margarine tubs, takeout containers, and jam jars
  33. You also use the jam jars as drinking glasses
  34. When toilet paper is on sale, you buy 100 rolls and store them
  35. You have a collection of miniature shampoo/conditioner bottles and little soap bars that you take every time you stay in a hotel
  36. The condiments in your fridge are either Price Club sized or come in plastic packets, which you "save" every time you get take out or go to McDonald's.
  37. You write your name on everything especially food containers, so people know that it's "yours."
  38. You carry a stash of your own food whenever you travel (travel means any car ride longer than 15 min)
  39. Your dad thinks he can fix everything himself
  40. Your house/apartment is always cold in winter, and hot in summer
  41. Your furniture doesn't match
  42. Your mom drives her Mercedes to Price Club, or Shoppers Food Warehouse regardless how far it is, even if Safeway is next door.
  43. You always look phone numbers up in the phone book, since calling Directory Assistance costs 50ยข
  44. You think ONLY Japanese can make good CARS!
  45. You use a colored face cloth every morning
  46. You starve yourself before going to all-you-can-eat places
  47. You call everyone older than you "Uncle" or "Auntie" even if they are not related to you
  48. You know the "new year" doesn't really start on Jan 1
  49. You use the calendars that you got for free at the local Asian market or Chinatown
  50. You fight over who pays the dinner bill

Isn't it interesting that Asians can share so many of the same characteristics? Even amongst the various Asian-American groups, there is an amazing amount of overlap. (For instance, we're all extremely thrifty, emphasize education, and hate losing "face.") Yet we are all very different as well, especially those of us who are torn between an Asian heritage and an American society. However, it is my personal observation that, despite the fact that culture plays such a large part of who we are, the culture of heaven can transcend all human social constructs and traditions. So whether you're Asian or non-Asian, Jew or Greek, etc:

[P]ut on the new man, which is renewed in knowledge after the image of him that created him: where there is neither Greek nor Jew, circumcision nor uncircumcision, Barbarian, Scythian, bond nor free: but Christ is all, and in all. Col. 3:10-11

So what do you think? Is the list accurate? Any others that should be added? Let me know your thoughts, Asian or not!


Blogger Joelle said...

I guess I'm part of an "Asian" family. Some of those characteristics apply to my family. I think it's because my mom grew up in Thailand, my parents moved over there later, and lived in Korea too... kind of gets in the blood after awhile.

Sunday, April 30, 2006 7:21:00 PM  
Blogger Eagle said...

This post has been removed by a blog administrator.

Monday, May 01, 2006 5:45:00 PM  
Blogger Adrian Zahid said...

I enjoyed your list. There is nothing wrong in having 100 or even 200 rolls of toilet paper!

Tuesday, May 02, 2006 1:34:00 PM  
Blogger Adrian Zahid said...

Here may be one to add to the list...
"Your behavior is judged not by what is right or wrong but by what "others" think."

Tuesday, May 02, 2006 7:48:00 PM  
Blogger Eagle said...

You like to receive red envelopes on Chinese New Years.

Friday, May 05, 2006 7:05:00 PM  
Anonymous Melissa said...

I'm justing visiting, but my immediate family is of both Korean and Chinese heritage so I enjoyed a moment of laughter with the list. Anyway, God Bless!

Sunday, May 07, 2006 3:03:00 PM  
Blogger limkenfl said...

Nice list!

Friday, June 30, 2006 10:02:00 PM  
Anonymous James said...

i can't tell which ones you wrote, they all seem to be pretty universal, good stuff

Friday, July 14, 2006 6:34:00 PM  
Blogger jshives said...

This post has been removed by a blog administrator.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006 11:10:00 PM  
Blogger jshives said...

am cheap, so a lot of these apply to me too (not at all asain, for those who dont know me) =) I think you added the one about the Christmas cards and the "auntie" one. The uncle and auntie thing still bothers me.

Tuesday, July 25, 2006 11:11:00 PM  

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